Men, conditioned by age-old conventions telling them to ‘man up’, have suppressed their mental health problems. “Try your best!’ ‘Boys don’t cry’, ‘Don’t be weak’; these are just some of the sayings we grew up hearing, we should always be tough, stoic and never express what we feel, because that would make us look weak!” Nikhil Taneja, mental health advocate and co-founder of Yuvaa, also draws attention to the stifling discussions surrounding mental health when it comes to men since its inception in September 2020, the Ministry of Social Justice and Empowerment of India’s helpline Kiran reports that about 70% of callers seek help support is male The numbers clearly point to the fact that men, conditioned by age-old conventions that require them to be men, have prevented their mental health problems. Men are less likely to seek help than women, according to mental health experts. Men account for 66% of deaths by suicide worldwide, yet they are 12% less likely to seek therapy. %.Explain this, psychiatrist Swapna “Not only do social attitudes create stigma, but their lack of acknowledgment of emotional distress is also seen as a weakness,” Nair shares. carrying the cards of existence in many cases, being the ‘sole earning member’ of the family, as well as being the ‘role model’ that the children follow. All this just adds to the stigma.”
men’s mental health
Traditional ideals of masculinity that require men to remain emotionally strong keep them from admitting their mental health issues. “Men’s mental health is often overlooked and the stigma is ingrained for a number of reasons,” says Tulika Mukherjee, lead psychologist at Bangalore-based mental health organization Peakmind. such as social norms, beliefs and perceptions. The main reason this barrier exists is because society conditions men to be emotionally strong, telling them that they don’t need mental health support to be mentally happy. ‘Mard ko dard hota hai, aur depression bhi!’Since most mental health problems in men stem from deep conditioning of gender norms, experts say these That concept needs to be changed. “In my experience, men are raised to be mentally strong in every situation – ‘Mard ko Dard Nahi Hota’ style – but the reality is dard toh hota hai, depression bhi. I went through an emotionally challenging journey as a professional, entrepreneur, manager, spouse, parent, etc. However, it took me a long time to realize the scope of my career. important of your mental health and seek help,” shares Neeraj Kumar, CEO of mental health and wellness organization Peakmind. Nikhil agrees, adding, “Yes a very toxic understanding of strengths and weaknesses What is that. And we are taught not to question it or express what we feel about it. As a man, you have to bury everything inside yourself. Boys grow up to be men who think similarly, because their parents often tell them ‘Don’t act like girls’. Some boys are even bullied at school because of their expressions. Change needs to start at a young age.” ‘Men may not change, but boys can’ Psychologists feel the change in narrative needs to start at the family level for change to happen. “While it may be difficult for grown men to admit and accept their condition, young men can grow up without that burden. Elders and parents at home need to rethink what they are letting young boys believe. They must validate their feelings and listen to them when necessary,” Nair said.
Having more conversations about work and related mental health will create awareness. More men need to speak up and talk openly about their mental health and make it “normal”. The workplace can be a great platform to promote this initiative.
Neeraj Kumar, businessman
For adults, consistent sensitivity and awareness are required. “We need to tell them again and again that it’s okay to not feel okay. There is no fear or shame in seeking help. We also need to make mental health more accessible while raising awareness and helping an individual understand the value of their health,” adds Mukherjee.
